Don't Rush... #bepatient

Everybody wants to be "boo-ed up" or have a special man or woman in their life. But understand, everyone will not find true love, everyone will not get married, and everyone will not have kids and live happily ever after. No, I'm not saying it can't happen or won't happen, but if you look at the reality of the matter many people have died and gone to Heaven (and perhaps Hell) and never got married, had intimate relations, or had kids. However, don't let that startling fact scare you into entering a relationship that's not for you, that's not good to you, and is not a positive situation conducive to the kind of love life you're looking for. Rushing to be in unhealthy relationships for the sake of not being alone the rest of your life might not be a good idea in the grand scheme of things. I don't know about you, and call me scared or a wuss, but I'd rather embrace my singleness, my happiness, my freedom and my self-esteem than to sacrifice all of that for something I'm not ready for or am unsure of whether it's a good thing for me. These  relationships of this day and time have shown me and taught me that sometimes waiting and being selective can be a positive thing. I'm learning that being cuffed ain't all it's cracked up to be and can be very much overrated. Oh and yes I plan to get married and have (look up at the sky in a side eyed way).... Yes I plan to get married and if it's God's Will plan to have...plan to have.... Yeah that..... But, I'd rather be alone and happily embracing me, my goals, and my life than to share my life with the wrong person who could potentially be the author of my unhappiness and rob me of my goals and who I am..... Take your time, don't be anxious, and think about it long and hard my friends... Wait for it... Doing grow weiry in your waiting. And while you wait ask God to send you who HE has for you and prepare you for them as well, also knowing that you may remain on the shelf for a while, and maybe even for good, because you are priceless and too worthy to be tampered with. Being untouchable does not mean being unlovable or not capable of loving. It simply means,,that's the role God gave you in HIS script of Life. ;-) Anyway.... All I'm trying to say is take love slowly (in my KC and JoJo voice)☺😊😁😀 #dontrushIt And there it is.. ~Dr. Rock Ramsey~

Get Qualified

Well.. it's been a super long day for me. It's after midnight here my friends so have a great night. But remember, that very thing you tell yourself you can't do.. Guess what? You can. If you try and are told you don't qualify, take that as your opportunity to recognize the gap or your own deficiency, and do what it takes to qualify. Example, if you don't qualify for a job because you lack the proper writing skills, that's your cue to go take a writing class so next time you apply that won't be your weak area. How bad you want something determines your level of effort you put in it. Lack of effort diminishes your ability and chances to achieve and succeed. You are your own worst enemy... Not your so-called haters..I hate to hear when a teenager or adult say "I've applied and they won't give me a job".. Find out why "they" won't. It might really be you that's the problem. If so, fix YOUR problem.. Face it, we don't qualify for half the jobs we apply for, but unless you have divine favor you need to invest in you and get qualified... Take a class, go to a seminar, anything. But don't remain unqualified and lose your hopes and dreams.... Good night bookworms and tweethearts...And there it is...

Men Take Notes

What Women Like in A Man

1). Good Hygiene. Women are into smells.. if you smell bad or your breath smells you need to handle that at all times. You can be the ugliest guy in the world but if you smell good and your breath is fresh you get major points off the bat.

2). Dress accordingly. If you are on a date.. no gym shorts and nike slides please. You don't have to be Sean John or Polo from head to toe but clean up a bit.

3). Be able to hold a good conversation that doesn't always surround what you have and what you have done. Talk about what inspires you and your future goals to better yourself.

4). Show her that chilvary is not dead and not just a first date thing. Open doors, etc.

5). Don't lie about your current situation, job, relationship, or responsibilities. Be honest so she can make an informed decision about you and if there is a need for a second date.

Why they stay

Memoirs of a Cheated on Woman.

If you've ever wondered why a woman stayed or stays with a cheating man or vice versa, let me holla at you: (some may agree and some may not)

Yeah she may love you and all of that, but trust me, no woman love a cheating man that much. It's deeper than that. The "let me show you all the ways I can love you and how much I love you" now becomes a part of the game and maximizes the superficial love they thought they once had. Understand me when I say that love after infidelity is not the same love as before it.... The plot thickens and the motives have been tampered with. It becomes a personal ego and power trip thing to prove to themselves that they are not losers and to now regain their self-esteem.. Some may not want to agree or accept this but it's true. How many times have you heard a woman say I hate or can't stand a liar or a cheater? If you've lied to her or have cheated on her.... Guess what? She probably can't stand you Sir and don't trust you further than she can see you. (Or she mis-spoke and actually meant she hates the act of a cheater but not the cheater themselves) And you actually think it's all about you after that... Nahhh..Taking a cheater back is a false mental sign to a woman that says "yes I won"... but for chronic cheaters that's only temporary. Once a cheater always a cheater? Perhaps but that's another subject... After being lied to or cheated on, Her mental state is good but slightly altered at this point. It doesn't have anything to do with you after a certain point. It's bigger and deeper. Their mindset and agenda changes when their emotions are in a wounded state. Don't get it twisted. It's not that the cheater's love was so great. Or that the woman has such low self esteem and can't find anyone else... Oh no.. It's just that our self pride is so much greater and we will do just about anything to stake our claim on what we deem as ours. The pride is So great that it will make us overlook some things that ultimately hurts us, just so we can say we still have pull or a dog in the fight. Just as men are competitors, so are we. You are not just going to wrong us and not care or experience recourse. The determination to stay in the fight to save face and clot tugs just as hard at our psyche as it does in a dog fight. A woman's worth is not predicated on the situation they are going through but how they fair in the end. It isn't until that woman realize that her true worth is not in what she will endure or take from a cheating man, but in her strength to say no more and realize that she deserve better than trying to prove her worth. At that point she evolves from proving her worth to herself and others and starts knowing her worth within. We get so busy at trying to prove our worth than knowing our worth and lose the battle and make fools of ourselves. Not only do we lose ourselves but we lose the fight that we never should have engaged in to start with. When it's all said and done if you are lucky, then and only then will the cheater see your worth, but at the end of the day all that you went through to prove your self worth may all just be in vain. So no, it's not that the sex was so good, or he took such good care of you, or even that you thought he was going to be your husband/ man sent from Heaven. As a matter of fact, when it's over you might even realize you didn't even like him to begin with... It was you all along not knowing your worth but trying to prove your worth when it wasn't even necessary. Of course she isn't better than you or look better than you or even better than you in bed... It was just that common denominator (the cheater) between the two of you that took advantage of two women that didn't know their worth but who were hell bent on proving they were worthier than the other. When you know better you do better. It may take a while to realize that you don't have to compete or prove yourself to anyone but when that moment comes you will be a fierce force to reckon with.... You can never prove you are worthy to be "the one and only" to a cheater or to the one they are cheating with. That's a lost cause..recognize that. And when you recognize that the conflict you are having is your own self determination within to prove something to yourself, you will be able to blow the whistle and throw in the towel so you can find better, feel better, and live better. Holding on to a relationship full of cheating is dangerous, hurtful, and it prevents you from moving on with confidence and knowing your worth. Before any one else recognizes your worth you should already know it and trust me, knowing so will prevent future foolishness from lasting once it's brought to your attention... Been there, done that.. This is my teaching moment based on experience.... Learn now, less suffering later.. I'm not telling you what I heard in telling you what I know... And there it is. This is my story and I'm sticking to it...
..#knowyoubeforeyouDoYou

My Dream

http://www.ebonygrainz.com/home.html

And There It Is...

Thank God For Favor

Great Morning World! Waking up Thanking God for Favor. I'm not picking on people, but a lot of you should be doing the same. When we look around and compare what we have (even if it's not much), to the tithes and couple of dollars we put in the offering for God, if the truth be told we should come up short on blessings. But thank God for FAVOR. He's doing a Favor for us by continuing to bless us inspite of our no dollars or "a couple" of dollars here and there that we give Him. Don't think that it was our "pocket change" that bought everything we have. Much of it, better yet... all of it, was FAVOR! He's not homeless and He didn't ask for "spare change", He asked for tithes and offerings.......... And even if you don't have to give, praises going up opens the doors to FAVOR! If I had 10 thousand tongues I couldn't Thank Him enough for His Favor in My Life! #FAVORED  #HappyWednesday